E vs RSV

Our sweet little Eliza Bug has certainly been through a lot in the last two weeks.

It all started on Saturday, March 17.  That morning Eliza awoke with what seemed to be the start of a cold.  This wasn't a surprise or even worrisome to me, because she and Stella had been passing multiple colds back and forth for what seemed like the last two months.

I felt sad that she was not feeling well, and of course worried that she may be unhappy and might not sleep much for her Nanas while we were away.

In all honesty I didn't worry much about it until later that day when Teresa informed me Eliza hadn't eaten since I had left to run my race, a total of nearly 6 hours, and seemed to be a little wheezy.

It was unusual and I knew it must be because she wasn't feeling well, but I still didn't worry too much.  When we arrived home after the race and getting some dinner she took a 6 ounce bottle with no problems.

That night she slept fine and I kissed her goodbye in the early morning hours without even thinking twice about her little cold.

Once we arrived in Puerto Rico we called to check in and Teresa again mentioned the wheezing.  She seemed slightly worried, but I still thought things would be fine.  She has had some wheezing with little colds in the past and I figured it was more of that.

We had left a paper with the information to the pediatrician, urgent cares, and ER; as well as insurance cards and letters giving permission for the grandmas to give consent for medical treatment if needed.

Of course we left knowing none of that was going to be needed, but it was there just in case.

We reminded Teresa where everything was and encouraged her to call the pediatrician if things seemed worse.

At this point I was a little more worried, but I think it was more about Teresa feeling stressed than something being seriously wrong with my baby.

After we left Puerto Rico I knew communication was going to be limited.

Monday we were out and about exploring St. Thomas and Tuesday was spent at sea.

Wednesday was our day in Barbados and I had decided I would send a text making sure my mom had made it (she came in on Monday night) and see how the girls were.

Texting was the cheapest way to communicate on the islands and on the ship, but for some reason our phones would not pick up any service anywhere!  I was so bummed as I tried to text all day while we were in Barbados and it would never work.  I figured I would use our friend's phone, but that day he got a little sick and we weren't with them for most of the day so it never happened.  I was sad I didn't get the chance to just hear how things were and put my mind at ease, but I figured I would try again the next day.

That night we were just getting ready to walk out the of our cabin for dinner when the phone rang.

I was in the bathroom and Ryan answered it very casually expecting it to be one of our friends as we  had been calling room to room all week.

When the conversation became very one-sided and all I could hear was Ryan answering with some hesitant "okays" and "uh-huhs", I started to get worried.

I stepped out of the bathroom and quietly asked who he was talking to.

When the answer was his mom my heart dropped.  I knew she would not be calling unless something serious was going on.  For one, calling the ship was super expensive, plus I knew she just wouldn't be bothering us over something insignificant.

I started feeling nauseous and lightheaded and immediately sat down on the bed.

I asked if someone was in the hospital.  He nodded yes.

I asked it if was Eliza.  Yes.

I asked if it was RSV.  Yes again.

I just knew that was what it was as soon as I realized it was Teresa on the phone.

In a way I am grateful those were my immediate thoughts instead of something more serious like a car accident or something.

The next 45 minutes were spent speaking to Teresa, my mom, and the nurses at the hospital about Eliza's situation.

As you can imagine I was a bit of a wreck. 

We didn't know if we should book a flight home or stay on the cruise.  I couldn't imagine having a good time if we were to stay, but after talking to our moms as well as the nurses and doctors it became clear that everything would be fine and that by the time we made it back to Columbus she would be out of the hospital and resting at home.

By this point our friends were wondering why we hadn't shown up for dinner.  They sent someone down expecting to find that we had fallen asleep and were so sad when they learned the real reason for our absence. 

The rest of that night was a little bit of a blur.  I think I was in a bit of shock and was just trying to process the fact that my poor baby was so sick and I wasn't there to help her.  It was rough.

We did end up staying and we did end up having a good time.

It is hard for me to describe our trip to people, because the vacation, experience, food, and friends were amazingly perfect.  However, at the same time, everything happening at home was a nightmare.  I am doing my best to separate the two from one another, but I still feel a lot of guilt about having such a good time while our moms were stressed out, losing sleep, and taking care of our sick child.

I am glad they took a few pictures of the experience, but my heart sure does hurt when I see that poor baby looking so helpless in that giant bed.

The next morning we decided to check with Guest Services about the possibility of using a phone to communicate with the hospital and grandmas.

We were ready and willing to pay the $2 a minute to call from our rooms, but I felt like we should just see what our options were.

As soon as we told them the situation they handed us a phone and said we were welcome to call whenever we wanted for the remainder of the cruise.  I can not express how wonderful and calming it was to know that we could check-in on things whenever we felt like we needed to without any guilt or stress about how much it was costing us.

We immediately called to check on our sweet girl and to try and find out more details surrounding the events that led to her hospital stay.

On Tuesday, March 20th the grandmas made the decision to call the pediatrician and have Eliza checked out.  The wheezing was getting worse and it seemed that overall her breathing was becoming more labored.  Add to all of this the fact that she was hardly eating and it was enough to make them worried.

The pediatrician gave E a breathing treatment and felt that it was going to be enough to get her feeling a little better.  She did not feel like the illness had progressed enough for further monitoring, but sent our moms home with the things they needed to give her another treatment if they felt it was necessary.

Once back home the grandmas administered another treatment, but were uneasy about how she seemed to be reacting to the medicine.  Her heart was racing and she was having to work so hard to get those breaths in and out.  Of course this made her irritable and tired, and it ended up being a long night for everyone.

Teresa was scheduled to fly home Wednesday at noon, so the decision was made to take Eliza to urgent care that morning before she left.  Both grandmas felt that they would just feel better about the situation if they knew she had been checked out once more before my mom was left alone with the girls.

So around 8 am they pulled Stella out of bed and quickly headed to the urgent care attached to Nationwide Children's Hospital.  As soon as the doctor checked her out it was determined she needed to move over the emergency room.  I dont' think either of our moms were expecting to hear that and that is when the real panic began.

Within five minutes of walking through the doors of the ER Eliza was surrounded by ten different nurses and doctors.  It was soon apparent that the situation was far more serious than they had hoped and that Eliza was going to have to be admitted into not only the hospital, but the pediatric intensive care unit for monitoring.

I can't even imagine how stressed our moms were feeling at this point!  I feel so guilty that they had to go through any of this, but I am so, so grateful that they were willing to make the decision to take her in.  That decision is hard enough for a parent to make for their own babies so I can't imagine trying to make it for someone else's child.

By this point Teresa had decided she needed to stay for a little bit longer to help with things and she quickly changed her flight to leave Friday morning instead.  Delta was actually very accommodating and while she still had to pay the difference in fares they waived the $150 change fee.  Teresa has a lot going on right now as Ryan's little sister is getting married in two weeks, so we really appreciate her sacrificing more of her time to help our girls.  She had to miss our niece Leyla's 1st birthday and barely made it home in time for a bridal shower for Ashlie.  Did I mention that earlier in the week she and the kids had to take shelter in our basement due to tornado warnings?  Yeah, I am not sure she is ever going to volunteer to babysit again!

By this point is was obvious that Stella couldn't be at the hospital any longer.

After a quick phone call to one of my dear ward friends arrangements were made to take care of and entertain Stella for as long as needed.  I am so grateful for the amazing women in my ward and their willingness to serve on a moments notice.

The help didn't stop there as our good friends Kevin and Nate were soon on their way to the hospital to give Eliza a blessing and to take Teresa to pick up Stella and then back to our house.

We are so thankful to have such wonderful people in our lives, especially our moms.  I don't know if I will ever be able to thank them enough (or stop feeling guilty) for all they did for our girls while we were gone.  While Ryan and I layed on the beach and swam in the ocean our moms got little to no sleep and had to deal with the stresses of having a baby in the hospital.  They are angels and we love them so very much.

Eliza ended up staying in the PICU until Thursday morning when she was transferred to a normal unit for further monitoring.  She had to be off oxygen and eating well before it was time to go home and that time finally came Friday afternoon.  I was so grateful to hear that she was eating again and headed home to rest without someone bothering her every few hours.

Our moms had such great things to say about everyone who treated and cared for our sweet baby during her entire hospital stay.  I know between the knowledgeable medical staff and her loving grandmas Eliza could not have been in better hands if I couldn't be there myself.

This entire situation was pretty stressful and scary for all of us, but I am so grateful that things turned out okay and that Miss Eliza is doing so well.

Ryan and I returned home very late on Monday night and you know I couldn't wait to get my hands on the little miss.

Eliza was sleeping peacefully on our bed and I just snuggled up next to her and cried while I kissed her sweet face. She still had a small cough and had pretty much lost her voice so she had this raspy, quiet little cry that just broke your heart. I think I will always feel a little guilt about not being there to hold her and comfort her during such a tramatic time, but I know she has already forgiven me and still loves me in spite of it all.

Tuesday morning we took her into the the pediatrician for a follow-up and learned that while the RSV was completely resolved she now had a double ear infection.  Poor girl can not catch a break!

We are now on day five of antibiotics and I can tell the little miss is feeling great.

Her giant smiles and perfect giggles are back in full force, she is eating well (although even after saving milk and pumping through our trip nursing still seems to be dwindling after all of this.  Yet another reason to feel guilty...), and sleep is starting to get back on schedule.

Amid all the chaos and sickness our little sweetheart turned five months old!

She continues to be such a joy in our lives and of course I can not get enough of her, especially after everything that has happened.

The girls loves baths, chewing on her fingers, and her big sister.  Oh how Stella can get this girl to smile and laugh.  It is pretty much the best thing ever.

She loves when we play "Pat a Cake" and sing the "Apples and Bananas" song, which is funny because that song would elicit the biggest giggles out of Stella as well.

One of my favorite things is dressing her each day.  I get to put her in all of Stella's old clothes and I love remembering Stella wearing them and how similar and different the two are.

If I thought I loved this little girl before the last two weeks started, I surely love her even more so now.  I am so lucky she is mine.